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  1. #1
    One Bad Sixxx is offline
    Six Times The Ass Kickin' One Bad Sixxx's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Location
    North Las Vegas NV USA
    Posts
    36

    Default For The Men!!! [Sorry Ladies...]

    The Guys' Rules

    [At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down. And finally, a guy's side to the story!!]

    We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side.

    *Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!*

    --------------------------------

    1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

    1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

    1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

    1. Crying is blackmail.

    1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one:
    Subtle hints do not work!
    Strong hints do not work!
    Obvious hints do not work!
    Just say it!

    1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

    1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

    1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

    1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.

    1. If you won't dress like the Victoria 's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.

    1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

    1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

    1. You can either ask us to do something
    or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

    1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

    1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.

    1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

    1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

    1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

    1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

    1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...Really.

    1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or monster trucks.

    1. You have enough clothes.

    1. You have too many shoes.

    1. I am in shape. Round is a shape.

    1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; but did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

    Dual Flowmasters Super 40s, MAC Longtube Headers, Dynomax H-Pipe, MAC Underdrive Pullies, Windstar Upper Intake Manifold, 70mm Power Throttle Body, Custom PVCPipe Cold Air Intake, Air-in 25mm Throttle Body Spacer, 4.10 Gears, 7.5 T-Lok, Roush Racing Springs, 9mm Ford Racing Spark Plug Wires, SCT XCal II Tuned

  2. #2
    wildthing is offline
    Gotstang? Regular
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    Apr 2005
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    chambersburg PA US
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    200

    Default

    lol thats great and so very true........

  3. #3
    NewOneSoon is offline
    ~~~TAZ~~~ NewOneSoon's Avatar
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    Apr 2006
    Location
    Some were CA USA
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    101

    Default

    SORRY IM A GAL...But that is so funny ...

    Dreams Come True As Long As You Never Quit Dreaming

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