lxexpress
09-25-2006, 01:12 PM
>>
>>
>> >>
>> >> Aquarius (Jan 23 - Feb 22) - You have an inventive mind and are
>> >>inclined to be progressive. You lie a great deal. You make the same
>> >>mistakes repeatedly because you are stupid. Everyone thinks you are
>> >>a fucking jerk.
>> >>
>> >>Pisces (Feb 23 - Mar 22) - You are a pioneer type and think most
>> >>people are dickheads. You are quick to reprimand, impatient, and
>> >>full of advice. You do nothing but piss-off everyone you come in
>> >>contact with. You are a prick.
>> >>
>> >>Aries (Mar 23 - April 22) - You have a wild imagination and often
>> >>think you are being followed by the FBI or CIA. You have minor
>> >>influence on your friends and people resent you for flaunting your
>> >>power. You lack confidence and
>> >>are a general
>>dipshit.
>> >>
>> >>Taurus (April 23 - May 22) - You are practical and persistent. You
>> >>have a dogged determination and work like hell. Most people think
>> >>you are stubborn and bullheaded. You are nothing but a goddamned
>> >>communist.
>> >>
>> >>Gemini (May 23 - June 22) - You are a quick and intelligent
>> >>thinker. People like you because you are bisexual. You are inclined
>> >>to expect too much for too little. This means you are a cheap
>> >>bastard. Geminis are notorious for thriving on incest.
>> >>
>> >>Cancer (June 23 - July 22) - You are sympathetic and understanding
>> >>of other people's problems, which makes you a sucker. You are
>> >>always putting things off. That is why you will always be on
>> >>welfare and won't be worth a shit. Everyone in prison is a
>>Cancer.
>> >>
>> >>Leo (July 23 - Aug 22) - You consider yourself a born leader.
>> >>Others think you are an idiot. Most Leos are bullies. You are vain
>> >>and
>> >>cannot tolerate criticism. Your arrogance is disgusting. Leo people
>> >>are thieving motherfuckers and enjoy masturbation more than sex.
>> >>
>> >>Virgo (Aug 23 - Sept 22) - You are the logical type and hate
>> >>disorder. Your shit-picking attitude is sickening to your friends
>> >>and co-workers. You are cold and unemotional and often fall asleep
>> >>while fucking. Virgos make good bus drivers and pimps.
>> >>
>> >>Libra (Sept 23 - Oct 22) - You are the artistic type and have a
>> >>difficult time dealing with reality. Chances for employment and
>> >>monetary gain are nil. Most Libra women are whores. All Libras die
>>
>> >>of venereal disease.
>> >>
>> >>Scorpio (Oct 23 - Nov 22) - You are the worst of the lot. You are
>> >>shrewd in business and cannot be trusted. You shall achieve the
>> >>pinnacle of success because of your total lack of ethics. You are
>> >>the perfect son-of-a-bitch. Most Scorpios are murdered.
>> >>
>> >>Sagittarius (Nov 23 -
>> >>Dec 22) - You are optimistic and enthusiastic. You have a reckless
>> >>tendency to rely on your luck since you have no talent. You are a
>> >>worthless piece of shit.
>> >>
>> >>Capricorn (Dec 23 - Jan 22) - You are conservative and afraid of
>> >>taking risks. You are basically chickenshit. There has never been a
>> >>Capricorn of any
>>importance.
>> >>
>>
>> >>
>> >> Aquarius (Jan 23 - Feb 22) - You have an inventive mind and are
>> >>inclined to be progressive. You lie a great deal. You make the same
>> >>mistakes repeatedly because you are stupid. Everyone thinks you are
>> >>a fucking jerk.
>> >>
>> >>Pisces (Feb 23 - Mar 22) - You are a pioneer type and think most
>> >>people are dickheads. You are quick to reprimand, impatient, and
>> >>full of advice. You do nothing but piss-off everyone you come in
>> >>contact with. You are a prick.
>> >>
>> >>Aries (Mar 23 - April 22) - You have a wild imagination and often
>> >>think you are being followed by the FBI or CIA. You have minor
>> >>influence on your friends and people resent you for flaunting your
>> >>power. You lack confidence and
>> >>are a general
>>dipshit.
>> >>
>> >>Taurus (April 23 - May 22) - You are practical and persistent. You
>> >>have a dogged determination and work like hell. Most people think
>> >>you are stubborn and bullheaded. You are nothing but a goddamned
>> >>communist.
>> >>
>> >>Gemini (May 23 - June 22) - You are a quick and intelligent
>> >>thinker. People like you because you are bisexual. You are inclined
>> >>to expect too much for too little. This means you are a cheap
>> >>bastard. Geminis are notorious for thriving on incest.
>> >>
>> >>Cancer (June 23 - July 22) - You are sympathetic and understanding
>> >>of other people's problems, which makes you a sucker. You are
>> >>always putting things off. That is why you will always be on
>> >>welfare and won't be worth a shit. Everyone in prison is a
>>Cancer.
>> >>
>> >>Leo (July 23 - Aug 22) - You consider yourself a born leader.
>> >>Others think you are an idiot. Most Leos are bullies. You are vain
>> >>and
>> >>cannot tolerate criticism. Your arrogance is disgusting. Leo people
>> >>are thieving motherfuckers and enjoy masturbation more than sex.
>> >>
>> >>Virgo (Aug 23 - Sept 22) - You are the logical type and hate
>> >>disorder. Your shit-picking attitude is sickening to your friends
>> >>and co-workers. You are cold and unemotional and often fall asleep
>> >>while fucking. Virgos make good bus drivers and pimps.
>> >>
>> >>Libra (Sept 23 - Oct 22) - You are the artistic type and have a
>> >>difficult time dealing with reality. Chances for employment and
>> >>monetary gain are nil. Most Libra women are whores. All Libras die
>>
>> >>of venereal disease.
>> >>
>> >>Scorpio (Oct 23 - Nov 22) - You are the worst of the lot. You are
>> >>shrewd in business and cannot be trusted. You shall achieve the
>> >>pinnacle of success because of your total lack of ethics. You are
>> >>the perfect son-of-a-bitch. Most Scorpios are murdered.
>> >>
>> >>Sagittarius (Nov 23 -
>> >>Dec 22) - You are optimistic and enthusiastic. You have a reckless
>> >>tendency to rely on your luck since you have no talent. You are a
>> >>worthless piece of shit.
>> >>
>> >>Capricorn (Dec 23 - Jan 22) - You are conservative and afraid of
>> >>taking risks. You are basically chickenshit. There has never been a
>> >>Capricorn of any
>>importance.
>> >>