Stang Gurl
12-25-2004, 11:14 PM
Twas the night before Christmas
Old Santa was pissed.
He cussed out the elves
and threw down his list.
Miserable little brats
ungreatful little jerks.
I have good mind
to scrap the whole works!
I've busted my a**
for damn near a year.
Instead of "Thanks Santa"
what do I hear?
The old lady b****es
cause I work late at night.
The elves want more money
The reindeer all fight.
Rudolph got drunk
and goosed all the maids.
Donner is pregnant
and Vixen has AIDS.
And just when I thought
that things would get better.
Those a**holes from IRS
sent me a letter.
They say I owe taxes
ain't that damn funny.
Who the heck ever sent
Santa Clause money?
And the kids these days
they all are the pits.
They want the impossible
Those mean little sh**s.
I spent a whole year
making wagons and sleds.
Assembling dolls
their arms, legs, and heads.
I made a ton of yo yo's
No request for them!
They want computers and robots
they think I'm IBM!
Flying through the air
dodging the trees.
Falling down chimney's
and skinning my knees.
I'm quitting this job
there's just no enjoyment.
I'll sit on my fat a**
and draw unemployment.
There's no Christmas this year,
now you know the reason,
I found me a blonde.
I'm going SOUTH for the season!
Old Santa was pissed.
He cussed out the elves
and threw down his list.
Miserable little brats
ungreatful little jerks.
I have good mind
to scrap the whole works!
I've busted my a**
for damn near a year.
Instead of "Thanks Santa"
what do I hear?
The old lady b****es
cause I work late at night.
The elves want more money
The reindeer all fight.
Rudolph got drunk
and goosed all the maids.
Donner is pregnant
and Vixen has AIDS.
And just when I thought
that things would get better.
Those a**holes from IRS
sent me a letter.
They say I owe taxes
ain't that damn funny.
Who the heck ever sent
Santa Clause money?
And the kids these days
they all are the pits.
They want the impossible
Those mean little sh**s.
I spent a whole year
making wagons and sleds.
Assembling dolls
their arms, legs, and heads.
I made a ton of yo yo's
No request for them!
They want computers and robots
they think I'm IBM!
Flying through the air
dodging the trees.
Falling down chimney's
and skinning my knees.
I'm quitting this job
there's just no enjoyment.
I'll sit on my fat a**
and draw unemployment.
There's no Christmas this year,
now you know the reason,
I found me a blonde.
I'm going SOUTH for the season!