meneep
02-24-2006, 12:40 AM
Artificial Insemination
A Welsh man buys several sheep, hoping to breed them for wool.
After several weeks, he notices that none of the sheep are
getting pregnant, and phones a vet for help. The vet tells him that
he should try artificial insemination.
The farmer doesn't have the slightest idea what this means but, not
wanting to display his ignorance, only asks the vet how he will know
when the sheep are pregnant. The vet tells him that they will stop
standing around and instead will lie down and wallow in grass when
they are pregnant.
The man hangs up and gives it some thought. He comes to the
conclusion that artificial insemination means he has to impregnate
the sheep himself.
So, he loads the sheep into his Land Rover, drives them out into the
woods has sex with them all, brings them back, and goes to bed
Next morning, he wakes and looks out at the sheep. Seeing that they
are all still standing around, he deduces that the first try didn't take,
and loads them in the Land Rover again.
He drives them out to the woods, bangs each sheep twice for good
measure, brings them back, and goes to bed exhausted.
Next morning, he wakes to find the sheep still just standing round.
"Try again" he tells himself, and proceeds to load them up, and
drive them out to the woods. He spends all day shagging the
sheep and upon returning home, falls listlessly into bed.
The next morning, he cannot even raise himself from the bed to look
out of the window. He asks his wife to look, and tell him if the sheep
are lying in the grass.
"No," she says,
"they're all in the Land Rover, and one of them is beeping the horn."
A Welsh man buys several sheep, hoping to breed them for wool.
After several weeks, he notices that none of the sheep are
getting pregnant, and phones a vet for help. The vet tells him that
he should try artificial insemination.
The farmer doesn't have the slightest idea what this means but, not
wanting to display his ignorance, only asks the vet how he will know
when the sheep are pregnant. The vet tells him that they will stop
standing around and instead will lie down and wallow in grass when
they are pregnant.
The man hangs up and gives it some thought. He comes to the
conclusion that artificial insemination means he has to impregnate
the sheep himself.
So, he loads the sheep into his Land Rover, drives them out into the
woods has sex with them all, brings them back, and goes to bed
Next morning, he wakes and looks out at the sheep. Seeing that they
are all still standing around, he deduces that the first try didn't take,
and loads them in the Land Rover again.
He drives them out to the woods, bangs each sheep twice for good
measure, brings them back, and goes to bed exhausted.
Next morning, he wakes to find the sheep still just standing round.
"Try again" he tells himself, and proceeds to load them up, and
drive them out to the woods. He spends all day shagging the
sheep and upon returning home, falls listlessly into bed.
The next morning, he cannot even raise himself from the bed to look
out of the window. He asks his wife to look, and tell him if the sheep
are lying in the grass.
"No," she says,
"they're all in the Land Rover, and one of them is beeping the horn."