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View Full Version : Stop the snoring?



Packer Backer
01-05-2006, 09:57 PM
A couple has a dog that snores. Annoyed because she can't sleep, the wife goes to the vet to see if he can help.
The vet tells the woman to tie a ribbon around the dog's testicles and he will stop snoring. "Yeah, right!" she says.
A few minutes after going to bed, the dog begins snoring, as usual. The wife tosses and turns, unable to sleep. Muttering to herself, she goes to the closet and grabs a piece of red ribbon and ties it carefully around the dog's testicles. Sure enough, the dog stops snoring! The woman is amazed!
Later that night, her husband returns home drunk from being out drinking with his buddies. He climbs into bed, falls asleep and begins snoring loudly.
The woman thinks maybe the ribbon might work on him. So she goes to the closet again, grabs a piece of blue ribbon and ties it around her husband's testicles.
Amazingly, it also works on him! The woman sleeps soundly. He wakes from his drunken stupor and stumbles into the bathroom. As he stands in front of the toilet, he glances in the mirror and sees a blue ribbon attached to his privates. He is very
confused and, as he walks back into the bedroom, he sees the red ribbon attached to his dog's testicles. He shakes his head and looks at the dog and whispers, "I don't know
where we were, or, what we did, but, by God, we took first and second place!"

Rwest75
01-05-2006, 10:30 PM
:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Ryan

1nasty96
01-05-2006, 11:45 PM
:rofl:

Rwest75
01-06-2006, 01:49 PM
Our local radio station DJ has a contest every day during her show to see who can tell the best joke so i called in just now and told it. She said she doesnt know if it will win or not so we will see. I think the winner gets tickets to the cape fear fireants hockey game. Im not a hockey fan but if i win i ll go if i win em.

Ryan

Rwest75
01-06-2006, 02:07 PM
Well i didnt win the radio station contest. I was beat out by a not as funny but much much shorter joke. Here it is

Ok I got good news and bad news

The bad news is i just rear ended somebody

The good news is i saved a ton of money on my Car insurance by driving off

Black Stallion
01-08-2006, 12:27 AM
:rofl:

Packer Backer
01-09-2006, 04:32 PM
Well i didnt win the radio station contest. I was beat out by a not as funny but much much shorter joke. Here it is

Ok I got good news and bad news

The bad news is i just rear ended somebody

The good news is i saved a ton of money on my Car insurance by driving offDamn, too bad you didn't win it... But driving off to save money does tickle the funny bone:lol: