FINALLY, THE BLONDE JOKE TO END ALL BLONDE JOKES.

[J]

A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, "Please come over here and help me.


I have a killer jig saw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get it started."

Her boyfriend asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?"

The blonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a tiger."

Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle.

She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table. He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says, "First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a tiger."

He takes her hand and says, "Second, I want you to relax. Let's have a nice cup of tea, and then....."

(He sighed),

"Let's put all these Frosted Flakes back in the box".

[Cobra94]

A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, "Please come over here and help me.


I have a killer jig saw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get it started."

Her boyfriend asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?"

The blonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a tiger."

Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle.

She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table. He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says, "First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a tiger."

He takes her hand and says, "Second, I want you to relax. Let's have a nice cup of tea, and then....."

(He sighed),

"Let's put all these Frosted Flakes back in the box".

OH HELL YA! thats good. :rofl:

[blown93feature]

:rofl:

[Rwest75]

:rofl: :rofl:

Ryan

[Hmongstang]

Did you hear about the blonde whose boyfriend told her he loved her???

yeah she believed him

[ClintEastwood]

did u hear about the asian who said he had a big penis?

yea no one believed him


oh yea, that was a good joke J, lol

[pete03GT]

lol :rofl:

[1nasty96]

loved the blonde joke...one of the best ive heard in awhile

[stone_turp]

So this blond goes vacationing to FL. She walks into a shoe store and asks to see a pair of alligator shoes. "those will be 400 dollars" said the salesman. "Thats too much! I'll go get my own!" She replied and stormed out of the shoe store. Then as the shoe store salesman was on his way home he saw the same blond on the side of the road waste deep in a swamp with about three alligators up on the bank and a few more in the water around her. "She's doing it!" He though so he got out to go ask her how she did it and about that time a gator was coming up to her and BAM! she shot it right between the eyes. Then she pulled it up on the bank lifted up it's leg examining it's foot and then said with a sigh " No, this one is wearing any either."

[Rwest75]

So this blond goes vacationing to FL. She walks into a shoe store and asks to see a pair of alligator shoes. "those will be 400 dollars" said the salesman. "Thats too much! I'll go get my own!" She replied and stormed out of the shoe store. Then as the shoe store salesman was on his way home he saw the same blond on the side of the road waste deep in a swamp with about three alligators up on the bank and a few more in the water around her. "She's doing it!" He though so he got out to go ask her how she did it and about that time a gator was coming up to her and BAM! she shot it right between the eyes. Then she pulled it up on the bank lifted up it's leg examining it's foot and then said with a sigh " No, this one is wearing any either."


:rofl:
Ok heres some I found.

1. CAR TROUBLE

A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic it died. After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly. She says, "What's the story?" He replies, "Just crap in the carburetor"
She asks, "How often do I have to do that?"

2.SPEEDING TICKET

A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license. She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you!"

3. BLONDE ON THE SUN

A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day.
The Russian said, "We were the first in space!" The American said, "We were the first on the moon!" The Blonde said, "So what? We're going to be the first on the sun!" The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook their heads. "You can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll burn up!" said the Russian. To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid, you know. We're going at night!"

4. One Liners.

Q: What do you call a blonde clutching at thin air?
A: A woman collecting her thoughts.

Q: What is every blonde's ambition in life?
A: To be like Vanna White and learn the alphabet

5. And Finally, the blonde joke to finally end all blonde jokes........

My wife (who is blonde) came running up to me in the driveway the other day...just jumping for joy!

I didn't know why she was jumping for joy but I thought: "what the heck?", and I starting jumping up and down along with her.

She said, "Honey, I have some really great news for you!"

I said, "Great. Tell me what you're so happy about."

She stopped jumping just long enough to tell me that she was pregnant. I was ecstatic! We'd been trying for a while, so I grabbed her and kissed her and told her, "That's great! I couldn't be happier!"

Then, she said "Oh, honey. There's more!"

I asked, "What do you mean 'more'?"

She said, "Well, we're not having just ONE baby. We're going to have TWINS!"

Amazed that she could know so soon after getting pregnant, I asked how she knew this.

She said, "Well, that was the easy part. I went to Wal-Mart and bought the Twin-Pack home pregnancy test kit and both tests came out positive!"

Ryan

[stone_turp]

You're a Tard! :rofl:

[YellowTech]

Must be your other wife who is pregnant...because I ain't pregnant! I'm reddish blonde from a bottle thank you very much!

LMAO