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View Full Version : Here's a couple of new ones



blown93feature
05-25-2005, 04:32 PM
Subject: hahaha, Money talks

-A crusty old man walks into a bank and says to the woman at the window,

"I want to open a damn checking account."

The astonished woman replies, "I beg your pardon, sir. I must have
misunderstood you. What did you say?"

"Listen up, damn it. I said I want to open a damn checking account now!"

"I'm very sorry sir, but that kind of language is not tolerated in this
bank." The teller leaves the window and goes over to the bank manager to
inform him of her situation.

The manager agrees that the teller does not have to listen to that foul
language.

They both return to the window and the manager asks the old geezer, "Sir,
what seems to be the problem here?"

"There is no damn problem," the man says. I just won $200 million bucks in
the damn lottery and I want to put my damn money in this damn bank."

"I see," say's the manager, "and is this bitch giving you a hard time?"


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Subject: Roses & Hanging Baskets

A teenage granddaughter comes downstairs for her date with
this see-through blouse on and no bra. Her grandmother just
pitched a fit, telling her not to dare go out like that!
The teenager tells her "Loosen up Grams. These are modern
times. You gotta let your rose buds show!" and out she goes.
The next day the teenager comes down stairs, and the
grandmother is sitting there with no top on. The teenager
wants to die. She explains to her grandmother that she has
friends coming over and that it is just not appropriate...

The grandmother says, "Loosen up, Sweetie. If you can show
off your rose buds, then I can display my hanging baskets.

Happy Gardening.....