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Squid
07-28-2008, 10:55 AM
After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social
Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's license
to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my
wallet at home.

I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and
come back later.

The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'.

So I opene d my shirt revealing my curly silver hair.
She said, 'That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me'
and she processed my Social Security application.

When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the
Social Security office.

She said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten
disability, too'

And then the fight started.....

**************************************************

My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I
kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a
nearby table.

My wife asked,' Do you know her?'
'Yes,' I sighed, 'She's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to
drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she
hasn't been sober since.'

'My God!' says my wife, 'Who would think a person could go on
celebrating that long?'

And then the fight started. ....

gunner_501
07-28-2008, 11:43 AM
:smack: LMAO

J
07-28-2008, 05:18 PM
lol

95stangguy
07-31-2008, 10:50 PM
I rear-ended a car this morning.
So there we are alongside the road and slowly the driver gets out of the car . . . and you know how you just get sooo stressed and life seems to get funny?
Well, I could NOT believe it . . he was a DWARF! He storms over to my car, looks up at me and says, "I AM NOT HAPPY!"
So, I look down at him and say, "Well, which one are you then?"
That's when the fight started...

bucket
08-01-2008, 12:07 PM
LAMO at all of them

RedTwilight
08-27-2008, 06:50 AM
My wife wanted me to take her out some place expensive to eat. So I took her to the nearest gas station...










That's when the fight started!