Evil_Torquetress
10-25-2007, 01:44 PM
This was a bulletin that had been circulating, but I stole it so everyone can read it because it made me laugh my ass off that other people do this too.... Enjoy!!
1) Your goal in modification is to beat a stock LS1 F-body.
2) Your first mod is flowmasters
3) You have mufflers and a K&N for a new mustang before you take delivery
4) Your car has 10,000 miles and the dealership mechanics say the squeaks and rattles are "normal"
5) Your answer for those squeaks and rattles is a louder exhaust.
6) You spend the money you withdrew on gas instead of food like you planned.
7) You have "Bullitt" on DVD, and you've seen the chase scene tons of times, but never the rest of the movie.
8) You notice every **** ricer on the road tries to race you
9) You look in the rearview every time you notice Mustang headlights.
10) You recognize the year and trim of that Mustang by those headlights (or tail lights in some cases)
11) You floor it under every bridge and overpass just to hear your car.
12) You can hear a Mustang from a mile away, and tell the difference between a 5.0 and a 4.6
13) Your windows squeak
14) You turn your music down and roll down your window to hear another Mustang's exhaust.
15) In the short walk from your car into the convenience store, you turn
around at least twice to admire your car.
16) You have ever come to a complete stop if there is water on the road
17) You have a towel and some quick detailer in the trunk in case you
forget rule #16.
18) The first thing you do when you get in your car is turn off the T/A
19) You know what T/A stands for
20) You have "lost a race" because of your T/A
21) When you have to respond, "what glove compartment"?
22) You know what PI stands for.
23) You use parts catalogs for reading material while on the "throne"
24) You laugh histaricaly at Fobras and Faleens, and you can spot them from a mile away.
25) You spend hours looking at different brands of the same product.
26) You know that you're one of the few cars on the road with true duals.
27) You get pissed that people want to ride in your car cause they add weight.
28) You put your mercedes outside so your mustang can stay in the garage.
29) When the stoplight is considered practice for the dragstrip.
30) An "intake" to you is more than just the piping leading to your throttlebody. (full manifold and up)
30) You wish they made INTAKES for your car that was under $1500(4.6)
31) You have to put the beer cooler in the back seat because it will not fit in the trunk. (coupe/convertible).
32) You you already know you're calling in sick the weatherman says 3-6 inches of snow forcasted for the rush hour.
33) You've ever been pulled over by a cop just to see your car
34) You have over ten parts catalogs under ur bed (best aftermarket)
35) You know where the real cupholder is (5.0 guys)
35) For every suspension mod you've done 10 engine mods.
36) You change your exhaust setup more often than u change ur hairstyle.
37) You've made your ricer friends hypotheticaly crap their pants on their first ride along.
38) You can change ur sparkplugs in 15 min... all 8
39) Your car is looked down on by older people if it doesnt have a 5.0
40) Your car leans to one side (5.0 guys)
41) You stare in astonishment if you see someone with a working ashtray door (5.0 guys)
42) Your air silencer is home to some mouse in the corner of ur garage
43) Your car has 200,000+ miles and still spanks others (5.0 guys)
44) You dread being at a stoplight next to a cop for fear of them hearing ur car at anything above 2k rpm.
45) You set off alarms like no ones biznis.
46) You remember people by what they did to their car.
47) You've gotten used to the "drone"
48) You occasionaly brag about how many stock things u still have on ur car.
49) You know what the porno interior is (5.0 guys)
50) You can tell when other drivers hide their jealousy with anger when you beat them, because they are used to beating Mustangs.
51) In the rain you still park your car a mile from the mall, because you don't want to car dinged.
52) Your car is always up on jack stands to make it faster, not because it broke (cough DSM owners)
53) You spend two hours a night on stangnet.com or STVperformance.com
54) The first place you look on a random Mustang is the front for foglights or the rear for dual exhaust
55) You've ever been flagged down in a parking lot by a total stranger and the spent the next 30 minutes shooting the breeze about the merits of the Foxbody vs. the SN95.
56) On long trips with your buddies, you still take two cars because no one will sit in the back seat.
57) You have the church van or school bus driving beside you telling you to punch it.
58) You have a 4 foot parts pile in your living room waiting for install.
59) When you come home late at night, you put it into neutral halfway.
60) You know what people are talking about when they say 4v.
61) You have to explain why modular cobras are called a Quad-cam.
62) You put your car in neutral to say "hello" to the f-body watching you drive by
63) You always do heel and toe downshifting.
64) You know ford transmissions are junk, But continue to modify anyways.
65) You know that 5th gear ( 5.0 guys ) cannot go past 145
66) You feel the body twist when launching hard ( 5.0 )
67) You can always win a arguement about best bang for the buck.
68) You cannot roll on Turbine wheels
69) You are always upgrading something.
70) You know the 5.0 with the airbag didn't come with tilt wheel.
71)You fear cops being behind you because they will harrass you about you're BFG or Nitto DR's having no tread in the center or coming head on because you have no front plate.
71) You drive with the windows down so cops don't harrass you about dark tint.
72)Everyone stares at you, girls turn around to look.
1) Your goal in modification is to beat a stock LS1 F-body.
2) Your first mod is flowmasters
3) You have mufflers and a K&N for a new mustang before you take delivery
4) Your car has 10,000 miles and the dealership mechanics say the squeaks and rattles are "normal"
5) Your answer for those squeaks and rattles is a louder exhaust.
6) You spend the money you withdrew on gas instead of food like you planned.
7) You have "Bullitt" on DVD, and you've seen the chase scene tons of times, but never the rest of the movie.
8) You notice every **** ricer on the road tries to race you
9) You look in the rearview every time you notice Mustang headlights.
10) You recognize the year and trim of that Mustang by those headlights (or tail lights in some cases)
11) You floor it under every bridge and overpass just to hear your car.
12) You can hear a Mustang from a mile away, and tell the difference between a 5.0 and a 4.6
13) Your windows squeak
14) You turn your music down and roll down your window to hear another Mustang's exhaust.
15) In the short walk from your car into the convenience store, you turn
around at least twice to admire your car.
16) You have ever come to a complete stop if there is water on the road
17) You have a towel and some quick detailer in the trunk in case you
forget rule #16.
18) The first thing you do when you get in your car is turn off the T/A
19) You know what T/A stands for
20) You have "lost a race" because of your T/A
21) When you have to respond, "what glove compartment"?
22) You know what PI stands for.
23) You use parts catalogs for reading material while on the "throne"
24) You laugh histaricaly at Fobras and Faleens, and you can spot them from a mile away.
25) You spend hours looking at different brands of the same product.
26) You know that you're one of the few cars on the road with true duals.
27) You get pissed that people want to ride in your car cause they add weight.
28) You put your mercedes outside so your mustang can stay in the garage.
29) When the stoplight is considered practice for the dragstrip.
30) An "intake" to you is more than just the piping leading to your throttlebody. (full manifold and up)
30) You wish they made INTAKES for your car that was under $1500(4.6)
31) You have to put the beer cooler in the back seat because it will not fit in the trunk. (coupe/convertible).
32) You you already know you're calling in sick the weatherman says 3-6 inches of snow forcasted for the rush hour.
33) You've ever been pulled over by a cop just to see your car
34) You have over ten parts catalogs under ur bed (best aftermarket)
35) You know where the real cupholder is (5.0 guys)
35) For every suspension mod you've done 10 engine mods.
36) You change your exhaust setup more often than u change ur hairstyle.
37) You've made your ricer friends hypotheticaly crap their pants on their first ride along.
38) You can change ur sparkplugs in 15 min... all 8
39) Your car is looked down on by older people if it doesnt have a 5.0
40) Your car leans to one side (5.0 guys)
41) You stare in astonishment if you see someone with a working ashtray door (5.0 guys)
42) Your air silencer is home to some mouse in the corner of ur garage
43) Your car has 200,000+ miles and still spanks others (5.0 guys)
44) You dread being at a stoplight next to a cop for fear of them hearing ur car at anything above 2k rpm.
45) You set off alarms like no ones biznis.
46) You remember people by what they did to their car.
47) You've gotten used to the "drone"
48) You occasionaly brag about how many stock things u still have on ur car.
49) You know what the porno interior is (5.0 guys)
50) You can tell when other drivers hide their jealousy with anger when you beat them, because they are used to beating Mustangs.
51) In the rain you still park your car a mile from the mall, because you don't want to car dinged.
52) Your car is always up on jack stands to make it faster, not because it broke (cough DSM owners)
53) You spend two hours a night on stangnet.com or STVperformance.com
54) The first place you look on a random Mustang is the front for foglights or the rear for dual exhaust
55) You've ever been flagged down in a parking lot by a total stranger and the spent the next 30 minutes shooting the breeze about the merits of the Foxbody vs. the SN95.
56) On long trips with your buddies, you still take two cars because no one will sit in the back seat.
57) You have the church van or school bus driving beside you telling you to punch it.
58) You have a 4 foot parts pile in your living room waiting for install.
59) When you come home late at night, you put it into neutral halfway.
60) You know what people are talking about when they say 4v.
61) You have to explain why modular cobras are called a Quad-cam.
62) You put your car in neutral to say "hello" to the f-body watching you drive by
63) You always do heel and toe downshifting.
64) You know ford transmissions are junk, But continue to modify anyways.
65) You know that 5th gear ( 5.0 guys ) cannot go past 145
66) You feel the body twist when launching hard ( 5.0 )
67) You can always win a arguement about best bang for the buck.
68) You cannot roll on Turbine wheels
69) You are always upgrading something.
70) You know the 5.0 with the airbag didn't come with tilt wheel.
71)You fear cops being behind you because they will harrass you about you're BFG or Nitto DR's having no tread in the center or coming head on because you have no front plate.
71) You drive with the windows down so cops don't harrass you about dark tint.
72)Everyone stares at you, girls turn around to look.